For people looking to date, friends trying to determine if there is sexual interest from their friends, or any of us thinking we might have a chance at some Xxx action, we have to all determine a level of interest from the other party. It’s not enough to get a side-long glance or a tweet, these days we are reaching out and communicating so often it’s not a surprise to get a hello from even the most remote of acquaintances. We need to look for a little more if we want to have that progression happen where we make a friend a date, make that date a steady romance, and make that romance into a Xxx sex partner.
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When it comes to women taking sex tips, they’re almost more likely to listen to the ‘experts’ at Cosmo Magazine than they are to listen to their own friends. The only problem with that is Cosmo seems to have gone and lost their minds because their tips are less ‘sexy’ these days and more ‘bat shit crazy.’
If you’re going hit up Cosmo during your singles sex search for ideas on how to spice up your love life, I’d advise against these.
#10. Treat Him Like An Atari Controller
You know when you’re giving your first hand job and you seem to be jerking it in all different directions? And how unsatisfied the look on your then-boyfriends face looked, despite the fact that he had been waiting 18 years just for someone to touch him there at all? Yah, it was that bad. But for whatever reason, Cosmo is suggesting that you do that again. They’re telling you to ‘treat his dick like an Atari joystick and move it all around.’ Please. Don’t do that.
#9. Pull His Pubes
I can’t believe that they’d suggest this: Cosmo is saying that guys love it when girls take their pubes between their teeth and pull. Not only is it a bad sensation, but the visual is enough to trigger our gag reflexes. There’s no need for two people to be gagging during oral sex.
#8. Jerk Him Off With Grapes
Cosmo wants you to hold grapes between your fingers while you’re giving a guy a hand job. First, how are you supposed to get a grip firm enough to be pleasurable without breaking the grapes? And second of all, who the hell would want to do that?!
#7. Shake His Nuts
“Take his testicles in the palm of your hand and shake them like you’re shaking dice.” No. No. Just no. Do not do this. That will feel like we’re on a bad train ride, not getting laid.
#6. Toss His Salad
If you don’t know what tossing the salad is, then you’re not missing out! Think about what you do when you go down on a female, except do it to the back door instead of the front. If he’s straight, he probably doesn’t want you poking around back there. Not to mention guys don’t have that many nerves around the opening of their rectum, so giving it a lick probably won’t do much for him anyways.
#5. Bite His Balls
Cosmo’s suggestion of taking the skin of his testicles and pinching them with your teeth is a boner killer, not a boner trigger.
#4. Do The Twist
“Make two fists around his dick and twist your hands in opposite directions as fast as you can.” Then immediately call 911, because that will hurt.
#3. Rub Ice On His Penis During Oral Sex
Have you ever seen that episode of Seinfeld when George gets caught without his pants on and it causes a woman to laugh? And he blames it on the fact that it was cold? I doubt it was ICE cold, so imagine what it would be like if you did freeze his member. Damn.
#2. Find His G-Spot
Do you know where a male G-Spot is? In his back door. Which is coincidently the #1 place straight men don’t want you to go. If you have a sexually adventurous boy toy, then you’re in luck, and you can go for it. But if you’re sleeping with a majority of men in America, you’re not going to want to sneak anything in there.
#1. Put A Donut Around His Dick And Slowly Eat It Before You Give Him A Blow Job
Which part about this is hot? The visual of a donut on a dick? You eating the dick? Getting a dry blow job because you used all your saliva eating dry pastries? The extra yeast you’re ingesting? Besides Fat Bastard, no man will want you to do this to him. Please advise.
So there you have it! If you’re thinking about being adventurous and doing something outside the box, trust me, you don’t want to try these.
You’ve tried everything to meet singles. You’ve asked your friends to hook you up, you’ve spread the word that you’re looking, you wear suggestive clothing when you go out, and you let it be known that you’re even OK with casual sex. So why aren’t you getting any dates?!
Well my friend, it might just be because you’re too desperate to date.
There’s a very thin line between putting yourself out there and putting yourself in an embarrassing situation. When you’re looking to date someone, of course you should make it known that you’re seeking, but not by words; by actions.
People get scared away easily by strong suggestions. Telling someone something like, “I haven’t had a boyfriend in 3 years and I’m really ready to get serious with someone again,” is enough to send any sane person running, but innocently flirting and getting to know someone is a great way to show that you’re open to the idea of dating.
Look closely at the dating lives of your friends. There’s a good chance that the people who are always single are the ones who are desperate to find a match, and the ones who always attract relationships are the ones who are care-free about their dating lives.
The more pressure you put on finding a date, the harder it’s going to be for you to get one. Next time you go out, don’t do it with the intention of bringing someone home. Go out and enjoy the time you spend with the people you’re around, and you’re going to be much more attractive to others!
An overwhelming amount of both men and women in North America think that it’s harder for them to meet singles when they’re overweight. Well guys and gals, sorry to burst your bubble, but you can’t hide behind that excuse anymore. In 2010, eight times as many people that got married were overweight. It’s the way of the world now in America! People are generally heavier, so you can’t use that as your excuse as to why you’re not getting any action.
What you can blame on your weight however is your shitty sex life!
People who are overweight have a harder time reaching orgasm. How much harder? Almost 45%!
What does this attribute to? Most of it has to do with physical abilities. Overweight people have a harder time in the sack because they get tired easier. They can’t contour their bodies in positions necessary to achieve a good orgasm, and in cases where there’s a little too much cushion for the pushin, you simply can’t get deep enough.
I’m not saying you should go out and drop 90 pounds. Everyone has a healthy weight for their height, and as long as you’re in that range, you’re able to lead a healthy and full life. But if you want to increase your chances at a better sex life, you should consider shedding some of your excess weight!
Don’t roll your eyes at us, we’re human! We have needs. And we want those needs met in the easiest way possible. Which is why we’ve done a little research and found out which people are the most likely to be down with giving oral sex! If you’re trying to meet singles, try meeting these ones:
#5- People who have just started a new job
When someone starts a new job, they’re optimistic about what the future holds and are excited about learning, and trying, new things. If they don’t usually give BJs on the average date, chances are they’re going to be a lot more open to it this time around!
#4- People who like holidays
This one sounds silly, but studies from the University Of California in Berkeley show that people who enjoy the holiday season like it because they are naturally more giving people. It makes sense, but what you probably don’t know is that those people with the giving spirit don’t just let it loose during Christmas– They also let it loose in bed!
#3- Talkative people
Talkative people have certain oral abilities that make them comfortable with using their mouths for a variety of things from giving speeches to giving head.
The same study done at Berkeley that revealed that holiday lovers are more giving in bed also claim that vegetarians are three times more likely to give oral sex than meat eaters.
#1- Social People
No shocker here! Social people are popular because they know how to keep people happy and give them what they want. I guess there’s no limit to their generosity!
The biggest mistake singles dating make when they’re trying to set up a romantic date is that they tend to go overboard. We understand that your girlfriend loves The Notebook and you want to make her feel like she’s in the movie, but she doesn’t actually want to be in that movie!
Let me explain…
A friend of mine from college was dating a girl who absolutely loved that movie. I’m not exaggerating when I say she watched it almost every weekend. So for Valentines Day, he thought it would be a rad idea if he gave her a Notebook day, which, in theory, was a great idea. But he did it the wrong way. He actually bought outfits that were like the ones in the movie and laid in the middle of a street waiting for a light to change. This girl has seen this movie over and over– what you’re doing is old news to her!
What he should have done was show her a date that had a Notebook feel. Instead of taking her in a boat surrounded by swans, simply take her in a canoe and play her favorite love songs while rowing. That way she’ll subconsciously associate the romance of your date with the movie, and feel excited on a whole different level.
Just like when you have the candle-lit sex fantasy. Girls love things like that, but guys tend to fuck it up. Why did you think you needed 82 candles and rose pedals everywhere?! A trio of candles is more than enough to set the mood.
You’re not setting a theme, you’re setting a feeling. Don’t go overboard with it!
romantic feel, not romantic theme
October always reminds me of how great boobs are. It’s breast cancer awareness month, which helps, but mostly it’s all of those slutty Halloween costumes that show off the tatas of all those women hoping to meet singles while at their costume parties.
The great thing about boobs are that every woman has them. You should start treating yours well! Here are a few tips on how to keep your boobs happy and healthy:
Use a loofah
Did you know that besides your armpits, your under-boobs have the highest number of sweat glands? That means they get sweaty and gross by day’s end. Clean ‘em up properly by giving them a good scrub!
Ditch the bra!
For women with large breasts and neck problems, you know how much of a pain it is to carry all that extra weight on your chest. But did you know that a lot of the stress your neck and shoulders feel aren’t from your boobs themselves, but from your bra? The pressure the straps put on your shoulders and back are creating the discomfort. Ditch the bra for a day and treat yourself to a silk shirt. Not only will the pressure be relieved, but the silk on your bare boobs will feel great. And if you have someone to bring home, try silk sheets! They’ll feel just as good on your boobs while you’re having sex as your shirt did during the day.
Make them look bigger without a plastic surgeon
If you’re a member of the itty bitty titty committee, chances are you’ve thought about what it would be like to have bigger hooters. There’s an easy trick without having to get surgery! The first is the obvious: a padded bra. But let’s face it, that’s just not enough. Grab the bronzer you have left over from last year’s Jersey Shore Halloween costume and sweep it in a circular motion around your boobs. It will give your breasts the shadows that larger ones have.
If you’ve been ignoring your boobs, pay them a little more attention! The creepy guy across the hall from you has, so join in on the fun!
Where’s the best place for 20-somethings to meet singles in the real world? The easy answer would be to say through an online dating site, and while that would be true if you were looking at where singles meet digitally, it’s not the same as where they have the best chance of meeting organically.
Believe it or not, the best chance at finding someone between 18 and 28 is on a university campus!
With a growing number of people enrolling in universities in 2010 and 2011, it’s no wonder that the highest concentrated number of 20-somethings in one place is at a school. But now that you know where to find them, how can you further that to finding someone to have a relationship with?
Head over to the campus coffee shop
When people have a few minutes in between class, chances are they’re not going to stand around and wait for their next class, they’re going to find something to do! Coffee shops are always filled with people who are looking to waste time, and what better way to do that then getting to know someone! Find someone sitting by themselves who has a free seat around them, and ask if you could take a seat. It’s an easy way to break the ice and opens the door to conversation.
Check out the library
Everyone needs to study in University, and the library is the place to go. If anyone catches your eye, mention the subject they’re reading up on and offer your expertise. If you don’t know anything about their field, ask them about it! Talking through their subject will help them study, so really by hitting on them, you’ll be doing them a favor!
Go to the campus store
Every university has a store that sells essential reading materials for class, and the lines are often longer than the wait to get into the college pub. If someone is buying a book they need for class, there’s no doubt they’d appreciate a little distraction with conversation as they wait in line.
Support your team at a sporting event!
Sporting events are great places to meet people because you already have something to talk about: The team! It unites the two of you with a common interest and makes it easy to talk in such a relaxed and fun environment. And, best of all, the endorphins you get while cheering for a team are the same ones you have while having sex!
It’s easy to meet people on campus, all you have to do is start talking!